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22 Thoughts While Waiting Out a Delay at the O’Hare Terminal B United Club

1) Shit
2) There are actually electrical plugs in here???
3) Cappuccino maker? Sweet!
4) No shortbread? Not sweet.
5) The Malaysia Airlines plane turned around and kept flying for 5 hours?????
6) Let’s look at the board and see where else in the world I would go today if I weren’t going home…OK, Fargo.
7) Damn, that torta at Frontera is really, really good – like, actual good, not airport good.
8) How could I franchise that?
9) How much money do I even have? I know Susan keeps asking me that. I should probably know the answer. Especially if I’m going to quit my job and open a sandwich place.
10) Yogurt-covered raisins.
11) If I were a vegetable, which vegetable would I be? Maybe celery.
12) Mental note: I need to shill for credit cards more on the blog.
13) Zzzzzzzzzzz
14) I should wipe that drool off the desk.
15) Wait – that plane DIDN’T turn around and keep flying? How long was I asleep for? At this point, shouldn’t CNN just be saying, “We will stop talking about this story until we have a clue what is going on.”
16) I wonder what that guy is working on on his computer.
18) Walk around
19) I’ve run out of stuff to read on the Internet.
20) Whenever there’s a terrible weather situation delaying flights, there’s always one lonely flight that doesn’t suffer the delays. Every flight to the NY area was either canceled or on a 3-hour delay. Except the 1pm to LaGuardia – left on time. Weird.
21) Hm, when I land in Europe at 7am, there’s always a gregarious group of people at the bar, drinking. I never see that in the US.
22) Why do people complain about kids in Clubs when the only child in here is silent watching a movie, while every adult is on a conference call?

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  1. having experienced countless numbers of my own delays at O’Hare, i can certainly relate. Thanks for the laugh.

  2. the hawaii card now has a chip!? no way!

    I dont get why beer for breakfast doesnt work in the US. Too bad.