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Adventures in TSA Ridiculousness

We’re flying down to Florida right now (on Spirit! And it isn’t awful!) and just had two purely delightful interactions with the TSA.

1) I take my iPad out of my bag to put it through the scanner. TSA guy comes over and shoves it back in my bag – “don’t that your iPad out! Did I tell you to take it out?” Me: “half the time they tell me to take it out. Half the time they tell me not to.” TSA guy: “don’t listen to them.” Perfect.

2) my wife has had a little metal self defense stick attached to her keychain that she has carried around for 5 years or so. Which means on probably 150 flights. TSA today said it wasn’t allowed on the plane. I explained that she has taken them on 150 flights. They said they didn’t care. They said “we can call port authority police down here and they can clear it or they will give you a summons.” Me: “is that a threat?” TSA: “no. You can take that chance.” Me: “if it’s not allowed, why don’t YOU give me a summons?” TSA: “I’m not saying it isn’t allowed.” Me: “shouldn’t I be concerned that we’ve flown 100 times through THIS airport with a supposedly illegal weapon?” TSA: “yes.”

Keeping us safe, one lie at a time.

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  1. Or was Spirit awful because they don’t participate in Global Entry, so you wouldn’t have had to put up with this in the first place?

  2. They might be sensitive about that in Florida, where ABC News caught the TSA agent with the ABC News iPad on national television via Find my iPad.

    His excuse? “My wife must have taken it.”

    Classy. Is that what machisimo is all about?

  3. Well I feel saver knowing she was finally not allowed to bring her weapon of mass destruction along.

  4. Too funny. I travel with a metal water bottle which on my last trip caused me to be searched 4 times at CDG and in SLC. No one was concerned with or found the pocket knife I had in my purse.