I fully recognize that hearing stories about people getting upgraded for a flight is about as interesting as listening to people recount poker hands they have played, which is to say entirely not interesting.

Yet here I am boring you exactly with that. You’re welcome.

I’m flying United to Denver. I was 5th on the upgrade list, but the flight was checked in full. Because I am an obsessive freak, I kept checking the upgrade list yesterday and there was no movement. I was at peace with my exit row in the back.

I awoke this morning to find they had swapped my 757 for a 767, which has 12 more seats up front, which is where I am sitting right now.

I felt as if my football team was down 18 with 5 seconds to play and they suddenly decided that touchdowns are now worth 22 points.

See you in Denver.